sabato 21 febbraio 2015

THE BEST OF ME TIRA FUORI IL PEGGIO DI ME





The Best of Me - Il meglio di me
(USA 2014)
Titolo originale: The Best of Me
Regia: Michael Hoffman
Sceneggiatura: J. Mills Goodloe, Will Fetters
Tratto dal romanzo: Il meglio di me di Nicholas Sparks
Cast: James Marsden, Michelle Monaghan, Luke Bracey, Liana Liberato, Gerald McRaney, Sean Bridgers, Caroline Goodall, Sebastian Arcelus
Genere: sparkstico
Se ti piace guarda anche: tutti gli altri film tratti dai romanzi di Nicholas Sparks

Paese che vai, usanze che trovi. Un antico detto popolare che oggi vale applicato anche ai luoghi virtuali di Internet, come questo blog. Ogni posto ha le sue tradizioni e pure qui a Pensieri Cannibali abbiamo le nostre. Ogni paese ha la sua sagra, Pensieri Cannibali ha la sagra del Nicholas Sparks, in cui il celebre scrittore americano viene cotto a puntino.
Non passa anno in cui non esca, puntuale come il Natale, un nuovo film di Woody Allen, un nuovo di Clint Eastwood e una nuova pellicola tratta da un romanzo di Nicholas Sparks, per chi non lo sapesse una specie di incrocio tra Alessandro Manzoni e Federico Moccia in salsa americana. Quindi sentimenti cristiani misti a un romanticismo disgustoso, svariati melodrammi, intrecci da soap-opera di quelli però più noiosi che goduriosamente trash, sviluppi da libretto Harmony, una serie di banalità assortite e frasi a effetto da baci Perugina. Il tutto accompagnato da un inquietante tocco di misticismo new-age, tanto per non farsi mancare niente.
Io di film tratti dai suoi romanzi ne ho visti parecchi, visto che mi voglio male, però non li ho visti tutti tutti, visto che non mi voglio così male. Nonostante me ne manchi qualcuno e nonostante non abbia mai letto i romanzi, ma solo visto gli adattamenti cinematografici, so esattamente come funzionano e quali ingredienti sono presenti ogni volta, al punto che potrei scriverne io un libro copia e vendere milioni e milioni di copie. Perché non lo faccio?
Invece di perdere tempo a scrivere una recensione di 'sto film di merda, potrei mettermi al lavoro sul "Nicholas Sparks fac-simile project". Ho già pronte alcune idee, tipo The Bababook, il sequel horror di The Notebook; Ho cercato il tuo nonno, la versione per la terza età di Ho cercato il tuo nome, e Vicino a te ho una fottuta paura, il prequel thriller di Vicino a te non ho paura.
Le idee non mancano, devo solo pensarci ancora un po' su. Nel frattempo vi parlo dell'ultimo film di merda tratto da un suo libro di merda. Che poi non è nemmeno così terribile, se paragonato ad altre recenti opere sparkstiche. Rispetto ai recenti Ho cercato il tuo nome e Safe Haven ad esempio è un pochino meglio, sebbene per quanto mi riguarda il (relativamente) migliore resti sempre I passi dell'amore.
In ogni caso, aspettandomi già il peggio, questo The Best of Me non mi è sembrato manco troppo agghiacciande. Oddio, se ripenso al finale sto ancora male perché una porcata di chiusura del genere è un colpo basso persino per Nicholas Sparks. Eppure anche il finale me lo immaginavo già. Ho sempre considerato Sparks come il Nemico e ormai mi sono ritrovato a pensare nel suo stesso modo. Mi sento come un detective sulle tracce di un serial killer, uno di quei profiler in stile Criminal Minds o Will Graham della serie Hannibal, che dopo un po' entra in connessione totale con l'assassino cui dà la caccia.

The Best of Me è come un Best of di Nicholas Sparks. Best of? Chiamiamolo pure Worst of. C'è il racconto che si dipana su due linee temporali, presente e passato. Il passato che è ambientato negli anni '90, sebbene gli anni '90 raccontati da Sparks nell'America dei bifolchi bigotti di provincia assomiglino a quella degli anni '30 de Le pagine della nostra vita più che ai 90s grunge per come sono stati nel resto del mondo. Anche qui poi c'è un amore contrastato tra una bella, ricca, intelligente e simpatica ragazza di famiglia che si innamora senza ragioni apparenti di un povero Cristo disadattato. Uno che dicono sia tanto intelligente, però quando 'sta fanciulla gli si para davanti con le gambe praticamente spalancate e lui non si rende conto che lei ci sta provando, non diresti che è proprio così sveglio.





Una cosa non l'ho capita di questo film, oltre al fatto che non ho capito perché continui a guardarmi film tratti dai romanzi di Nicholas Sparks. Essendo una storia che si svolge su due linee temporali, i protagonisti sono interpretati da attori diversi. Lei da giovane è Liana Liberato, fanciulla con un gran bel futuro davanti, mentre da “vecchia” è Michelle Monaghan, quella di True Detective. Fino a qui tutto ok. Sembrano davvero madre e figlia e beato chi se le piglia.


La scelta dei due attori che hanno la parte del protagonista maschile Dawson (ebbene sì, si chiama proprio così) da ragazzo e da adulto non c'entrano invece una mazza l'uno con l'altro. Dawson prima è il giovane attore Luke Bracey e poi da grande diventa James Marsden. Mai visti due attori tanto diversi in uno stesso ruolo. Tra l'altro Bracey sembra la versione vecchia di Marsden, non il contrario.


La storia è quindi la tipica classica banale vicenda d'amore sparkstico. Passato e presente che si intrecciano, tante lettere, come se ci fosse ancora qualcuno che le scrive, baci sotto la pioggia che se no non sarebbe un vero film tratto da un suo romanzo e tanto, proprio tanto dolore. Nicholas Sparks ai suoi personaggi porta una sfiga che manco Shailene Woodley se si impegna. Oppure, più ancora che sfiga, il suo è proprio odio, come nemmeno Shonda Rhimes nei confronti dei poveri characters dei suoi telefilm.
Tra galera, incidenti, figli morti o moribondi, un marito alcolizzato, un padre violento (il vero idolo del film, alla facciazza dei buoni sentimenti sparkstici), un altro padre che offre al boyfriend della figlia $ 80.000 per sparire dalla sua vita e il boyfriend – bravo pirla! – li rifiuta, e chi più ne ha più ne metta, in The Best of Me ai due protagonisti succede proprio the worst. E credo di avervi detto solo una piccola parte delle sfighe che capitano loro.

"Piove! Presto, dobbiamo baciarci!"
"Se no cosa succede?"
"Succede che Nicholas Sparks ci fa fuori nel sonno."

Il film, come tutti i titoli sparkstici che si rispettino, ha allora tutte le carte in regola per farsi odiare, e a tratti l'ho odiato parecchio. Se il risultato finale non è così devastante in senso negativo come mi aspettavo è per merito di un cast che se la cava bene e con cast intendo soprattutto che Michelle Monaghan + Liana Liberato riescono a rendere le due ore di visione un'agonia sopportabile. Certo però che se ripenso al finale...
Nicholas Sparks, i tuoi romanzi saranno anche la quintessenza della spiritualità e della cristianità, ma secondo me tu in realtà sei il figlio di Satana!
(voto 4,5/10)


"Ti ho aspettata per tutti questi anni senza farmi nessun'altra. Quanto sono romantico?"
"Ma quanto sei sfigato! Io in tutti questi anni l'ho data a chiunque mi passasse davanti: uomini, donne e bambini.
L'ho data persino a Nicholas Sparks!"

48 commenti:

  1. E' sempre il solito Sparks, ma è buono proprio e a me non dispiace mai per davvero.
    Godibile.

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. Ma Nicholas Sparks in realtà non è buono.
      Nicholas Sparks è il Male.
      Proprio come il Reverendo Camden di Settimo Cielo... :)

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  2. Questo commento è stato eliminato dall'autore.

    RispondiElimina
  3. Ah ah, l'ho visto anche io pregustandomi già la tua recensione! Mitico il genere "sparkstico", sei un grande! :-D Cmq a me questo film ha fatto più schifo degli altri di Sparks, il finale è drammaticamente banale e prevedibile fin da subito... e cmq scelta di attori maschili per interpretare il "prima" e il "dopo" veramente assurda!

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. Il finale è terrificante.
      Però nel mezzo la parte 90s, per quanto sia una versione sparkstica dei 90s, l'ho trovata a tratti quasi decente.
      Quasi, eh. ;D

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  4. Risposte
    1. Lo prendo come un complimento.
      Anche se non credo ci andasse molto per fare meglio del film. ;)

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  5. Vabeh ma questo vuol dire farsi del male!! Eccetto che per Le pagine della nostra vita, tutti gli altri film di Sparks dovrebbero essere vietati in tutti i cinema #SparksAct

    RispondiElimina
  6. Inutile dirlo, ma pare anche a me una vera merda gigante. :)

    RispondiElimina
  7. Ognuno si fa del male come meglio preferisce: c'è anche chi si da martellate sui c...

    RispondiElimina
  8. whahaha che figura di me*da quello di settimo cielo XD
    Per quanto riguarda il preferire le rece del Cannibale ai film stessi,è facile che capiti,perchè esse sono fantastiche!!!!
    Liana&Michelle sponsor ufficiali della legge della maniglia!
    Mi sono appena procurata the lucky one(ho cercato il tuo nome),spinta da un amica che conosce il mio disgraziatissimo romanticismo pescino,ti saprò dire come va in sede appropriata ;)

    RispondiElimina
  9. Secondo me il tuo giudizio è stato fin troppo buono.veramente pessimo film,con attori scelti pessimamente.E poi è vero quando erano giovani non si capisce affatto che sono gli anni 90.

    RispondiElimina
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